Health is so important to us nowadays. What with all the contaminated food around the globe and so many people having cancer from all ages.

Recently, I watched a tvb series, the last episode where the Joe Pa make a birthday wish (correct right?). He wishes this (probably sound weird when I translate it in English), “I wish to be healthier than Hou Ma, and that she will pass away earlier than me”. Ok, that didn’t came out right yeah. But it was such a sweet and thoughtful thing. I can relate to that remark.

Having a healthy life means you can enjoy your life with your love ones. Being ill and all will make them worry about you and stress them out for the rest of their life. Being healthy also means that you can take care of your love ones and see them happy in your arms. Being healthy means you can travel the world with your love ones and enjoy the life as it is.

So take care of your health, drink less, smoke lesser and drive safely. It will be very sad if you leave your partner all alone in the end, missing you for the rest of life. 

I came back damn angry tonight.

Certain disputes make me question further, madly. It was ignored and avoided but I was persistence. Perhaps a simple no was not taken well and anger was shown, thus I was shoo-ed aside. I got angry, also thanks to my PMS timing that being pushed around is something that I don’t wish to feel right now. Therefore my temper flared. I drilled for answers. I drilled to know for what the reaction/action. I drilled to know why such statements when one can save the breath to voice it out. What I get was silence. Walking away is the best thing to do, just like what I’ve learned most of the time. However, this time I couldn’t help but to ‘throw’ certain words out to comment about the past. I was surprised of my vulgarity as well.

If it was me 2 years ago, tears might have threaten me at once, but now it is more like fury is threatening to spill out like lava from an angry volcano, and burning anyone that tries to get near me!

Sometime I ask God, if I’ve learned so well to walk away from confrontation, why I didn’t learn how to walk away for good. Most of the time I didn’t know what to do. When incidents like this happened, many memories flashes through my mind like M16 shooting every cell in your brain. Whenever I question myself later, I will tend to reminiscent about the good times and the effort, and then I became quite lost. Thus, I decided to let it be.

Seriously, my temper is very bad now. Even my dad was trying to asked me to do stuff and talk to me, I pushes everything away and told him to ask someone else to do it as I have no mood or time to do it. I continued to stare at my screen and started blogging.

I can totally relate to this ‘Ignorance is bliss’. Once again, I would have to ignore it and tomorrow will be a better day.  

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations.

A thought struck me when I attended a funeral of my friend's dad tonight.

You choose to be in a relationship or should I say you choose your partner based on certain criteria and you are sure that with those criteria that you do not want, you would not pursue them at all, right? Now, you ask yourself what type of criteria you would want in a partner. Sometimes, it’s funny how we choose with so many reasons behind, with a list of everything that you want to find in a partner and yet we did not check out whether we are someone that anyone would want. I am probably talking rubbish here, mind my mind.

What I wanted to say is this. You choose someone for a reason. And you choose to marry him/her for a reason too. Either it is all about love, or it could be you couldn’t find someone better than them, just because of that simple reason you found in him/her.

Attending that funeral make me think hard on one question. Imagine 2 scenarios here with me. (The thoughts has nothing to do with the deceased)

You lay down on your death bed, with all the wires plug in and out through the machines beside you, helping your body to function and out-lived your time to go. Of course, you have all the money in the world to have that privilege with all good nurses and doctors to tend to you, just to prolong the time on earth. Everything was taken care of by the people you love with the money. However, you don’t feel happy. You wish to die faster. Why? None of your love ones are beside you although they pay a visit once awhile.

You are on your death bed at home. In pain. Suffering. But, your love ones are tending to all your needs, caring for you, feeding you and stay beside you while waiting for your ‘time’. You do not have the money privilege to splurge for good medication and stay in hospital. You life is cut short due to it. You are unhappy with the time limit but you feel the love from all your love ones.

Tell me which one you would prefer? 

I was trying to figure out the meaning of ‘thinking of you’ and the meaning of ‘missing you’.

Are both the same or different?

The simplest way will be when you think about someone means you missing them, and when you miss them makes you think about them. Right?

Well, what if both are quite different? When you miss someone, your heart beat flutters the moment you think about them and you feel warm all over. However, that doesn’t mean the same when you are thinking about someone. If you think about someone and your heart flutters, that means you are missing them, but if your heart doesn’t flutters, that means you are plainly thinking of them fondly. Did I make you lost? Do I sound like I am crapping now?

Or can someone define better than me please?